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♪♫ You've been coolin', and baby, I've been droolin', all the good times, baby, I've been misusin' ♪♫
A tale of Rock Gods, Groupies, and a love that becomes more sincere when kept secret ♪♫ Jealousy feeds the beast inside us all ♪♫

Thursday, March 21, 2013

1500 views!


Thanks, once again! Here's your rare photo. Next goal is 2000, and then 3000! Expect good pictures!

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Two Tickets to Paradise

Upon arriving at the river-side cabin (so far west of Surrey that it was on the Henley-on-Thames River Terrace), Bonzo threw his luggage outside of the limo and tumbled out, his bourbon bottle held carefully in his hand. Robert stepped over him with his clodhoppers and exceptionally wide bellbottoms as if Bon was a muddy doormat and he didn't want to ruin his hem by stepping on it. He clapped and flipped his hair behind his shoulder before turning to the limo, hands clasped together and a whimsical smile on his face, and called to Jimmy.

"It's splendid, perfect for the weekend." He sighed and made approving noises as he made his way to the cabin door. The cabin itself was that of luxury. More of a log cabin, it was something out of a rich magazine. Two levels, backed by a thicket of beautiful field maples, with large open windows every few inches, the cabin was more than perfect for a weekend get-away. The wood looked aged with Hungarian-Swedish style and a bit of Irish flare, but what was really amazing was the German architecture. It was something straight out of the rolling hills near Austria. Judging by the outside, the bridge house could easily and comfortably fit over four families.

As it seemed, I was the only one dreading the weekend. The entire ride to River Terrace, Jimmy and Charlotte, his wife, had been infatuated and I was jealous. She had "gotten a chill" from the horrid winter weather outside and Jimmy had gladly given her his jacket. And to think he held my hand! Then again, it probably meant nothing, but-- Oh! how I wish it did! Poor Bianca had promised in advance to pretend not to be involved with Jim.

"Why am I even going, then?" she had snapped. "I have work to do at Abbey Road!" Plus, she had added, Daphne couldn't come with. Jimmy had suggested Daphne go house hunting and spend some time at her mother's, which Daphne agreed would be a good weekend.

"Fine, stay and see what I care, love," Jimmy had teased. Eventually, urged by his sarcasm and aloofness, Bianca had decided to go. Now, it was obvious she regretted it, especially the part where her boyfriend was dating a sexy French model with the cutest accent you'd ever heard. Jealousy gripped more than me today.

After getting situated inside the beautiful cabin, and having placed dibs on rooms, Bonzo and Patricia disappeared with their kids, as did Charlotte Martin and Jimmy and Mo and John Paul. Robbie, Maureen, their kids Carmen and Karac, G, Bianca, some other friends of the guys and I were the only ones left in the front room, before the Plant family excused themselves as well. The lot we were on was so large that the four families could be exploring the lot without ever bumping into each other.

Sighing of boredom while lounging in the comfy front room, G went on about his tale of a fight between him and some producer. He was the most un-professional professional manager I had met, but there was no doubt in anyone's mind that he loved the boys. They were his family and it almost brought a tear to my eye seeing him interact with them in a casual environment.

Getting up and leaving the cigar-smoke filled living room, I slipped outside into the snow and rain. Mud flecked snowbanks walled the drive and the tree branches dripped with melting snow. It was a sore sight for tuned eyes. Plunging my hands deep into my pea-coat pockets, I made my way toward the river silently, singing a song I had just heard in my head. As my boots crunched in the snow to the beat of the song, I began humming and, eventually, belting out the lyrics to the frigid river.

"No more Mister Nice Guy
No more Mister Clean
No more Mister Nice Guy
They say he's sick, he's obscene"
 
"Alice Cooper?" came Jimmy's voice from behind me. Startled, I turned to see he and Charlotte arm-in-arm and little Scarlet in Jimmy's grasp making their way down toward the river. "He's thinking about taking the Starship off our hands. Peter's considering it, but we haven't gotten the dates for next year yet. Hell, I don't even know what we're having for supper tonight, or what I'm getting lil' Scar for Christmas." Putting a hand to his mouth to guard it from Scarlet, he added, "Or what Saint Nick is getting her."

"Better start considering," I said, trying not so sound bossy, "because Christmas is in-- what?-- three weeks? Nice to see you again, Charlotte, I haven't spoken to you since Thanksgiving."

Upon reaching me, we hugged and she smiled at Jimmy. "Zis is so bootyful, Zames. Sank you so much for renting zis place-- a get-away iz jost what Scarolet and I needed. And you, too, Jenni. 'Ow 'ave you bean?"

After a second of recovering from her accent, I grinned at Charlotte and replied, "Oh, I've been fantastic, Charly, thanks for asking. Do you like the property?" I directed the question at Jimmy and he gave me the widest smile I'd ever seen from him.

"It's breath-taking. Freezing, but worth it. We'd better head in soon, My Lady. Scar may catch cold." He removed his right arm from Charlotte's waist and adjusted the scarf around Scarlet's neck. She looked zoned-out but absolutely adorable, which was inevitable for a two-year-old. With a final smile at me and a wink, Jimmy wrapped his arm around Charlotte's waist again and they headed back up toward the cabin.

Entirely unexpectedly, it began sprinkling and the warm rain melted the snow just enough for mud to form at my feet. Sighing, I turned to head in when, immediately, the clouds darkened and it began to pour. "Motherfuck! Really?" I called to the Heavens, assessing my soaked clothes. Hurriedly, I sprinted up the muddy hill toward the cabin and saw Bonzo and Robert doing the same with their wives and kids nestled under their arms. Reaching the door first, I held it open for the families and they thanked me quickly, shaking off in the mudroom. Leave it to England to snow three hours earlier and downpour now.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Hair of the Dog

The kitchen was in shambles and Leenin was bubbling about ruined pots in the corner when Jimmy returned. Half an hour ago, this room had been transformed into a ring for a devastating row with Robert and just the mere sight of broken pottery on the floor brought fresh anger to Jimmy's mind. He wasn't mad at Robert per say, but he was mad at what his supposed mate had said. Calmly, Jimmy scooped the shattered tea cup he had aimed at Robert's head into his hand and set it on the island counter, collapsing over it. Robert was right. That's why he had gotten so furious; he knew Robert was right.

"Bianca's going to find out, Jim!" he had spat venomously at the cafe table near the window, sipping his Earl Grey. "I thought you had a head on your shoulders from day one but I suspect no longer!"

"Mate, she'll never find out if you just keep your bloody cake-hole shut up for once! This isn't the first time I've been in this predicament, sakes!"

"So if I were to bonk Bianca," Robert had wagered, sailing uncharted territory, "you would make the argument that you had Jenni? Mate, you're throwing your love away! And you're married! You're positively bonkers!"

This had been when he had thrown the tea-cup straight for Robert's golden waves, missing by, ironically, a hair. The memory of his blood curdling and boiling was enough to bring it all back. "You stay away from Bianca! And if you tell Charlotte, I swear on the Queen I'll kick you out of this band! Jenni is just a temporary fascination that concerns you none at all, so never you mind my personal business!"

"Jenni's fond of you, you cunt! You're playing her and if you do for much longer, I'll tell Bianca!" Robert knew he was pushing the limit now.

Furious, Jimmy had made a point to throw a tantrum, and, more importantly, every cooking instrument in the kitchen. He emptied the Lazy Susan on the island, scattered the pans that had been hanging on the pot rack, and threw just about everything he could get his hands on toward Robert. Sure, the breakfast of cocaine probably had a lot to do with Jimmy's row with Robert, but he was furious even after the out-break.

Why had he made the mistake of telling Robert he had held Jenni's hand anyway? It wasn't that great an accomplishment, but he just had to brag. Now the kitchen was ruined, his friendship with his best mate was in question, and the possibility of Robert giving up on the band was ever looming. Moving the band into the house was a terrible idea! They were all sick of each other in the first place; not mad, just tired of seeing the same person every day. Tensions were high and Jimmy needed a way out. For the time being, it seemed Jenni was his escape, and although he knew he didn't really like her like he did Bianca or Charlotte, she was fun. All he knew was that if he wanted to keep the arguments to a minimum and keep the peace, he couldn't tell anyone about his exploits with Jenni ever again.

He raised an eyebrow at the idea of a secret lover living in the same house as he\im and his girlfriend. Dare he say he was turned on? The idea was so... devious, interesting...

Robert entered the kitchen with his fingers hooked on his back pockets. Biting his cheeks and looking at the floor ahead of him, he coolly hesitated before speaking. "Look, Pagey, I'm--"

"No, I'm sorry," Jimmy said first. "I over-reacted. I know you're right, I just have a hard time accepting it. I don't want to play Jenni, and I don't want to cheat on Bianca. I want to be there for Charlotte and Scarlet too, but I'm doing the best I can. I haven't seen Scar for about three months now, and even Bon gets to see Jason about five times a week. I- I just can't right now. I'm stressed and this band has taken a lot out of me. But I don't regret it. You're my best mate and I'm sorry I almost hit you with pottery."

There was a pause and Robert laughed to the ground, his blonde locks covering his face. He grinned up at Jimmy and responded, "Yeah, well, you've terrible aim."

"I'm a guitarist, not a mercenary," Jimmy laughed back. While Jimmy searched the room for a conversation pick-up, Robert came over and extended his hand, which Jimmy slapped away. Strongly, he pulled Robert into a tight, brotherly embrace and patted his best friend's back lovingly. "I love you, man."

"Don't get all nancy on me," Robert chuckled. Over Jimmy's shoulder, he added, "Hey, Leenin, we're heading out. Think you can pick up this kitchen on your own?"

The cook groaned while Robert and Jimmy separated. "Take care of her," was all Robert said to Jimmy. Who "her" was was a toss-up.

For My Newest Follower, Maggie

 

 

 
"Jenni... You're mine." He says that, I swear.

 
In celebration of my newest follower, back by (VERY) popular demand, I introduce my husband to the world; Jimmy Page's son, James Jr. Our age difference is pretty acceptable-- he's only 10 years older than me. He loves me very much and his dad and I are tight. Excuse me while I go cry in my pillow out of sadness, will you?

Awesomesauce



A Hazy Shade of Winter

The guys needed to start getting serious, Jimmy thought. Robert's back to his Black Country reefer days and John Paul's been disappearing with Bonzo at the local pubs, getting pissed even though Pat and Mo told him Bon had a drinking problem. Am I the only one still trying to keep this band together? It's been six years and I'm still the one pulling all the weight.

Then there was Bianca. Besides his problems with the boredom of Zeppelin, Bianca had teased him far beyond his capacity. She was just another mouth to feed now, and even though he was wise with money and the like, he couldn't help but wonder whether she was worth keeping around. These days it seemed the only reason he kept her around was because she and Jenni didn't have a home otherwise and she served him well. What kind of bird would impose two tenants? The last thing he wanted was for Daphne to live with them. Good Lord! Lord forbid he ask Bianca to find Daphne a home. For sake's alive, man! Grow a pair and move them out before you grab a fist full of hair and just let rip.

The one person he wasn't so inclined to evict was Jenni. She was interesting and rebellious; fairly pretty, pioneering, and hysterically comical even when he was in the worst of stress spouts. Another thought hit him: Bianca was at work, Daphne was in her room beside Bianca's, Jonesy and Bonzo were in the sound room, inseparable as they always were, and Robert was out with his wife and son. Jenni was out at the pond, shooting the first snowfall of the season with her Eastman Kodak. Should he join her?

♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪

A snowball came whizzing by my head and shattered on a tree. Surprised, I turned quickly to see the beautiful contrast of Jimmy in his black pea-coat against the white snow. His hands were shoved so deep in his coat pockets that his shoulders were higher than they would have been in a comfortable standing. He let his shoulders drop as he walked toward me, grinning and sniveling. His nose and cheeks were already rosey and he hadn't even been outside for five minutes.

"Getting some good shots?" he asked as he reached me, his hair curtaining his rosey face perfectly. His straight white teeth glinted at me through his smile and I couldn't help but shiver, but not from cold.

I gave a nervous laugh. "Yeah. I almost got the perfect shot of a man taking my head off with a snowball, thanks."

He shrugged and laughed. "I thought you could use some company."

"With a snowball?"

"With me. We could do a candid session. Take some film, do some raunchy photos; it's up to you." He laughed again and leaned on a tree. "Have you been to the pond yet? I bet it's brilliant."

"I was actually heading that way. Want to come? I can already tell you it isn't cold enough to freeze over. The snow is already melting-- probably getting ready for another rain storm tomorrow."

"I wouldn't put it past Surrey. We're the rain capitol, you know." We both smirked and I turned to head to the lake. He jogged up and walked beside me as we walked down the snow-hidden path. "Do you have pockets in that coat?"

"No."

Then Jimmy did the most wondrous thing, making my blood boil and my mind spasm; generously, he took my right hand and laced his fingers through mine, pulling my hand into his coat pocket with his. As if he didn't know what he was doing to me, he asked, "Is that better?"

"Much," I breathed, watching my breath rise to the sky in vapor form. In a worried tone, I added, "This doesn't go back to B, okay?"

"None of this will."

"None of this?" Were there more things that Jimmy was going to do? I thought. Oh God, I hope so.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Another Surplus... With Some Freaktoids

I love this picture. It proves jusy how silly Pagey is.
This one, too.
 
 
 
When did Robert get his ear(s) pierced?
Oh my God... So fucking sexy I can't stand it.
 
 
 
 
 
So, it's a proven fact that the Brits love drag comedy... Case and point. Robert's, er, partner is Roy Harper.

I Found the Rest of That Photo from 1969!