Two Tickets to Paradise

Upon arriving at the river-side cabin (so far west of Surrey that it was on the Henley-on-Thames River Terrace), Bonzo threw his luggage outside of the limo and tumbled out, his bourbon bottle held carefully in his hand. Robert stepped over him with his clodhoppers and exceptionally wide bellbottoms as if Bon was a muddy doormat and he didn't want to ruin his hem by stepping on it. He clapped and flipped his hair behind his shoulder before turning to the limo, hands clasped together and a whimsical smile on his face, and called to Jimmy.

"It's splendid, perfect for the weekend." He sighed and made approving noises as he made his way to the cabin door. The cabin itself was that of luxury. More of a log cabin, it was something out of a rich magazine. Two levels, backed by a thicket of beautiful field maples, with large open windows every few inches, the cabin was more than perfect for a weekend get-away. The wood looked aged with Hungarian-Swedish style and a bit of Irish flare, but what was really amazing was the German architecture. It was something straight out of the rolling hills near Austria. Judging by the outside, the bridge house could easily and comfortably fit over four families.

As it seemed, I was the only one dreading the weekend. The entire ride to River Terrace, Jimmy and Charlotte, his wife, had been infatuated and I was jealous. She had "gotten a chill" from the horrid winter weather outside and Jimmy had gladly given her his jacket. And to think he held my hand! Then again, it probably meant nothing, but-- Oh! how I wish it did! Poor Bianca had promised in advance to pretend not to be involved with Jim.

"Why am I even going, then?" she had snapped. "I have work to do at Abbey Road!" Plus, she had added, Daphne couldn't come with. Jimmy had suggested Daphne go house hunting and spend some time at her mother's, which Daphne agreed would be a good weekend.

"Fine, stay and see what I care, love," Jimmy had teased. Eventually, urged by his sarcasm and aloofness, Bianca had decided to go. Now, it was obvious she regretted it, especially the part where her boyfriend was dating a sexy French model with the cutest accent you'd ever heard. Jealousy gripped more than me today.

After getting situated inside the beautiful cabin, and having placed dibs on rooms, Bonzo and Patricia disappeared with their kids, as did Charlotte Martin and Jimmy and Mo and John Paul. Robbie, Maureen, their kids Carmen and Karac, G, Bianca, some other friends of the guys and I were the only ones left in the front room, before the Plant family excused themselves as well. The lot we were on was so large that the four families could be exploring the lot without ever bumping into each other.

Sighing of boredom while lounging in the comfy front room, G went on about his tale of a fight between him and some producer. He was the most un-professional professional manager I had met, but there was no doubt in anyone's mind that he loved the boys. They were his family and it almost brought a tear to my eye seeing him interact with them in a casual environment.

Getting up and leaving the cigar-smoke filled living room, I slipped outside into the snow and rain. Mud flecked snowbanks walled the drive and the tree branches dripped with melting snow. It was a sore sight for tuned eyes. Plunging my hands deep into my pea-coat pockets, I made my way toward the river silently, singing a song I had just heard in my head. As my boots crunched in the snow to the beat of the song, I began humming and, eventually, belting out the lyrics to the frigid river.

"No more Mister Nice Guy
No more Mister Clean
No more Mister Nice Guy
They say he's sick, he's obscene"

 

"Alice Cooper?" came Jimmy's voice from behind me. Startled, I turned to see he and Charlotte arm-in-arm and little Scarlet in Jimmy's grasp making their way down toward the river. "He's thinking about taking the Starship off our hands. Peter's considering it, but we haven't gotten the dates for next year yet. Hell, I don't even know what we're having for supper tonight, or what I'm getting lil' Scar for Christmas." Putting a hand to his mouth to guard it from Scarlet, he added, "Or what Saint Nick is getting her."

"Better start considering," I said, trying not so sound bossy, "because Christmas is in-- what?-- three weeks? Nice to see you again, Charlotte, I haven't spoken to you since Thanksgiving."

Upon reaching me, we hugged and she smiled at Jimmy. "Zis is so bootyful, Zames. Sank you so much for renting zis place-- a get-away iz jost what Scarolet and I needed. And you, too, Jenni. 'Ow 'ave you bean?"

After a second of recovering from her accent, I grinned at Charlotte and replied, "Oh, I've been fantastic, Charly, thanks for asking. Do you like the property?" I directed the question at Jimmy and he gave me the widest smile I'd ever seen from him.

"It's breath-taking. Freezing, but worth it. We'd better head in soon, My Lady. Scar may catch cold." He removed his right arm from Charlotte's waist and adjusted the scarf around Scarlet's neck. She looked zoned-out but absolutely adorable, which was inevitable for a two-year-old. With a final smile at me and a wink, Jimmy wrapped his arm around Charlotte's waist again and they headed back up toward the cabin.

Entirely unexpectedly, it began sprinkling and the warm rain melted the snow just enough for mud to form at my feet. Sighing, I turned to head in when, immediately, the clouds darkened and it began to pour. "Motherfuck! Really?" I called to the Heavens, assessing my soaked clothes. Hurriedly, I sprinted up the muddy hill toward the cabin and saw Bonzo and Robert doing the same with their wives and kids nestled under their arms. Reaching the door first, I held it open for the families and they thanked me quickly, shaking off in the mudroom. Leave it to England to snow three hours earlier and downpour now.